Category Archives: Humour

A Steve Coogan joke

The temperature inside this apple turnover is over 1,000 degrees. If I squeeze it, a jet of molten Bramley apple will squirt out. Could go your way; could go mine. Either way, one of us is going down. Chris

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Mike’s answer to obesity

Tell all overweight children It’s a special diet for you now If you are hungry, you can eat as much Slug slime as you like. Or if you prefer, crushed beetle legs With worms flesh don’t forget the fleas eggs … Continue reading

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A Russell Howard quip

“Kids do really well in their A Levels, and how do we respond? ‘A’ levels are getting easier!’ In my day, you had to do 50 questions in a minute, and if you got one wrong, they killed your Dad!” … Continue reading

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It’s a bit extreme but….

Peggy

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Jack Dee on people with allergies

If I’m pushed, I’d also admit I don’t like people with allergies. They just annoy me. There seems to be something far too self-centred about it. “No thanks, I’m allergic.” Why not just say ‘No thanks’? I wasn’t asking for … Continue reading

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God and airline pilots

Question: What’s the difference between God and an airline pilot? Answer: God doesn’t think he’s a pilot. Chris

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Florida Woman Stops Alligator Attack with a Beretta Pistol

“While out walking along the edge of a pond just outside my house in the Villages with my estranged husband, we were attacked by a huge 12-ft alligator. It charged with jaws wide open. If I hadn’t had my Beretta … Continue reading

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