Maid: “I’d like a raise.”

Lady Chatterley: “Why do you deserve a raise?

Maid: “Two reasons. I’m a better cook than you.”

Lady Chatterley: “Who told you?”

Maid: “Your husband. And I’m better in bed than you are as well.”

Lady Chatterley: “I suppose my husband said that?”

Maid: “No, the gardener.”

Lady Chatterley: “How much do you want?

Inspired by D H Lawrence’s Lady Chatterley’s Lover (1928) which was banned as pornographic and is now regarded as a classic