Two campers are hiking in the woods when one is bitten on the rear end by a rattlesnake.
“I’ll go into town for a doctor,” the other says. He runs ten miles to a small town and finds the doctor delivering a baby.
“I can’t leave,” the doctor says. “But here’s what to do. Take a knife, cut a little X where the snake bite is, suck out the poison and spit it on the ground.”
The guy runs back to his friend, who’s in agony.
“What did the doctor say?” the victim cries.
“He says you’re gonna die.”