Mike has been in police work for 25 years. Finally sick of the streets, he quits his job and buys 50 acres of land in Alaska. He sees the postman once a week and gets groceries once a month. Otherwise it’s total peace and quiet.

After six months of almost total isolation, someone knocks on his door. He opens it and a huge bearded man is standing there.

“Names Cliff, your neighbour from 40 miles up the road. Having a Christmas party on Friday night. Thought that you’d like to come about 5 p.m.”

“Great,” says Mike, “after six months out here I’m ready to meet some local folks. Thank you.”

As Cliff is leaving, he stops. “Gotta warn you. Be some drinking.”

“Not a problem, says Mike. “After 25 years as a policeman I can drink with the best of them.”

Again the big man starts to leave and stops. “More ‘n’ likely gonna be some fighting too.”

“Well, I get along with people all right. I’ll be there. Thanks again.”

“More’n likely be some wild sex too.”

“Now that’s not really a problem,” says Mike, warming to the idea. “I’ve been all alone for six months I’ll definitely be there. By the way what should I wear?”

“Don’t much matter. Just gonna be the two of us.”