“What are you reading, old man?” He asks.

“I’m learning Hebrew, comrade,” replies the old Jew.

“Why are you learning Hebrew? You know it takes years to get a permission to travel to Israel? You will die before you get one.”

“I’m learning Hebrew so when I go to heaven I can speak with Moses and Abraham.”

“How do you know you’re going to heaven? What if you go to hell?”

“I already speak Russian.”