Seamus offered a beautiful senorita a drink and charmed her with Irish stories and songs. He went back to her room and they had a passionate affair. One night, she told him she was pregnant.

Seamus gave her a large sum of money and sent her back to Italy to have the child. He said if she stayed in Italy to raise the child, he’d provide child support until it turned 18.

To keep it discrete, he told her to send a postcard, and write ‘Spaghetti’ on the back. He’d then make the payments. About 9 months later, he came home to his confused wife who said, ‘You’ve got a strange card today.’

He read the card turned white, and fainted. It read:

Spaghetti, Spaghetti, Spaghetti. One with meatballs, two without send extra sauce.